Pornography- a Love Story

“I consistently run into where people who are like, ‘Oh, you’re just a whore.’ I will always, for the rest of my life, have to fight that stereotype.” -Jenna Jameson

I remember when I was growing up looking at the covers of the erotic romance novels my grandfather used to read. A long-haired Adonis with chiseled cheekbones and stomach muscles lusting after the blonde whose blouse is about to burst open at any moment with desire and passion graced the covers. That was my first experience with pornography; softcore musings written by women who probably weren’t getting the action they wanted at home, like my grandpa.

I do watch porn. I’ve been watching it since my early teenage years when I used to sneak peaks at the Skin-a-Max channels while visiting my mom’s house. I’ve used porno to improve my sexual game and have learned plenty of things from the films I’ve watched.  I’m not addicted to it and I usually stop watching it during the rare occasions when I find myself in a relationship. However, during the times that I am single and feeling especially lonely and ugly, craving some kind of male touch, watching pornography brings comfort. It’s kind of like watching your favorite cinematic film- think of a rom-com except with a lot more skin.

There’s an article in today’s paper about the business of pornography and its presence in American culture. It is one of the few industries with a steady growth during this economic recession, which should be something to account for. The focus of the article was about how it desensitizing relationships and negatively used in advertising. I understand that there are those who claim (some) pornography lowlights women negatively and transforms our bodies into mere objects (The same could be said about men but that is something rarely commented on). Because of porn, women (and men) are forced to look and behave a certain way, trading in their values for trashy looks and positions. (Please note: the human mind is naturally attracted to slender, most busty/ muscular figures for the natural act of procreation.) There are those that say porn ruins families, emphasizing the ‘horridness’ of the movies, not that actual behavior of the family member watching it.

I know the reason why I enjoy pornography. Not everyone is fortunate enough to have a boyfriend/girlfriend, wife/husband. There are people that are generally awkward and not good is social situations. There also comes to the point of physical attractiveness- ridiculous standards that our society holds. You’re born with a deformity or even a crooked nose- these are things you can’t help. If you don’t fit these standards, you’re not getting laid. Now before I’m argued with, think about that. There are so people who will never get the hot girl in the bar or the kind of lover who is willing to make the extra effort to sexually please them. Everyone deserves that special, sexual attention and a lot of the time, they will never get it. This is where porn comes in. It can make us feel desirable and sexy. We are be able to connect with our bodies in ways that we can do with a lover that we will never obtain.  We’re not dirty for watching it. We are just simply giving our bodies the pleasure they need and deserve.

Porn is just movies and movies are a form of escapism and entertainment. They rarely mimic real life. The beauty of porn is you get to chose whether or not to open your eyes and watch it.